An Email From A Close Friend

I've decided to published part of the email below that I've received from a friend before my trip to KK. I didn't asked my friend's approval to put it here but I just feel wanna blog or pour it out here. I'm sorry. I was depressed after I finished reading it and on my second thought I don't know what to say about it. In the end, I didn't replied this email. I know this friend is going to write me a long email. I can feel it. But I didn't do anything at all. Maybe I'm hiding something from you all and maybe I've changed. I know myself very well and I know how you all felt from your side. I've been busy with work since new year until now. And at the same time, I was avoiding and trying from not making the situation get worst and most important thing, I don't want to get myself complicated into things at all. That is why I never had my own room or time for myself. Just work work work...This is not the first time it happened to me. I would never looked back again and again or something bad experience I had gone through all my life. I've learned from my mistakes alot and actually I've changed alot within these few years back.

Please give some time. Please hold on there. I'll correct the thing back to the way it used to be. Just don't want to have another repeated bad experience to be happened again...sorry...

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hi, how are u?
U hv been quiet huh?

or are u just ignoring me..part of me are very upset with u and part of me try to put myself in your shoes. I dont know this is right or wrong but i would just like to express my thoughts and feelings..

.. i am very dissappointed with things that turn out. A and B actually think that you are not like what we have thought earlier. And actually u have already grown mature and a likeable caring person.I am dissappointed that things are not as it was before. Like i say before i do not have many really close friends that i can go pour my thought wit. And ppl i enjoy doing things with.. Only my heart knows who are those ppl.

I always think that frens go through thick and thin together,share happiness and be each others pillar of strength when the other needs it.

Once again i am making this effort to contact u. sometimes i really really feel like.... hitting you!! i am really really dissappointed with you. I hope i can be the understanding fren as much as i hope you can understand what i feel.
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I want u to understand that i look for you not because i have no one else to look for, or not because i 'berhutang budi' with you... i am merely just looking for a fren.. if i think you are not worth it, i wont give a damm of wheter u ever call me anymore or not.

B always tell me.. through an incident you can always know who are those that is worth your care... and i always answer 'i know'.....

Hope you are fine.. and i think you must be looking forward to your holiday trip. Have a safe and super time.
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